Amelia Earhart
July 24, 1897 – (missing) July 2, 1937
There was a huge Wikipedia entry on pioneering female aviator Amelia Earhart, who vanished into thin air on July 2, 1937...and sure, I could have quoted from it liberally. But I'm not about to do this. It's not that I don't trust Wikipedia. I mean, hell, it's full of lies, but that's never stopped me before. What stopped me was that the story of Amelia Earhart is a simple one. You don't need paragraph after paragraph of boring words to tell her tale.
In the end it's as simple as this: She had a plane. She had a womb. She disappeared.
That's really all we need to know. She and her co-pilot Fred Noonan went poof and the entire freakin' navy spent weeks looking for them, to no avail. There are tons of conspiracy theories stating that she faked her death, was abducted by aliens, became Tokyo Rose, was captured by cannibals, what have you. In truth she was probably trying to tune in soap operas on the plane's radio and caused the plane to dive right into the ocean. Am I right, fellas? Those chicks and their "stories"? It boggles the mind.
As a result, Amelia Earhart is the first, last, and only famous female aviator. There are no others because this one didn't work out so well. Am I wrong? I don't think I'm wrong.
It's like Danica Patrick. We're all pulling for her, but the first time she goes into a wall (God forbid), you'll never see another female Indy driver. It's just the way it goes. Women have equal rights, but not equal equal rights. Even after all this time it's not the same. Never will be.
Now, I'm not gonna say that women should be barefoot and pregnant. That's silly. I'm not a barbarian. Of course you can wear shoes. You're still gonna have to mow the lawn, after all. Now go make me a turkey pot pie, chop chop!
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